Condolence Letters from Children

A parent of your child’s close friend has died. Even if your child has attended the funeral, sent flowers, visited, or telephoned, a condolence letter is a must. A commercial sympathy card will not do. Remember that condolence letters are comforting and diverting for those who have suffered a loss. Sometimes they become part of the family history to be passed down through the generations.
The letter should be written in ink with a fountain pen if possible. Try to use black ink. If the child’s handwriting is hard to read, it is all right to have the letter typed and signed in ink.
The condolence letter should not be a formal, formula letter; it should be written from the heart. Your child can begin by acknowledging the friend’s loss and saying that he or she feels sad about it. The condolence letter is the place to recall the special characteristics of the deceased, visits to your home, lessons learned from that person, good times shared. Such reminiscences celebrate the life of the deceased rather than being morbid and depressing about the loss.
Above all, don’t spend all your time saying how upset you are. The person who receives it might think you are the one who should be getting the condolence letter.

Children and Correspondence

Children who write notes and letters give a great deal of pleasure and have a better chance of experiencing the pleasure of receiving correspondence in return. More important, they grow up imbued with the knowledge of the power and pleasures of personal correspondence.
It is never too early to begin giving your children a respect for the written word and the ceremonies surrounding it. Even before children are old enough to write, they will be aware that writing letters is an important activity: “I’m writing to Aunt Nora to thank her for ….”